Because of the Internet, the World Crashed

I know you read this title and thought, “here she goes again being all crazy and conspiratorial”. And yes, at this point, there’s no room in the inn for my mental and emotional being, but as Kanye so poignantly puts it, “NAME ONE GENIUS THAT AINT CRAZY!”

Anywho, this post should be brief (lettuce pray). So I was having a discussion with a friend and I was telling this friend about my colloquium presentation that’s coming up. For my graduate program you have to do this extensive  presentation on a subject of your choosing that has to relate in some form or fashion back to social work. Well ya girl is an intern at a school, and has the pleasure of shaping beautiful, young minds. (I’m being dramatic, these kids cuss me out, call me bad names, cry on my shoulders and buy me gifts. Our relationship is very tumultuous but I know they mean well) Anywho, I noticed my children all have this insane attachment to their iPads (my students are literally BAD and BOUJEE because they cut up, but each have iPads). These iPads were implemented to help with in-class work and homework. They take tests on them, except when the internet catches the flu which is like every other week, and according to the 6th grade boys, they upload porn videos. (I really love and hate adolescent boys simultaneously) They send evil ass text messages to one another, for example: OMG did you see Sasha’s face. She looks like a cheetoh. Or Wow, how dare that b%^*# look at my boyfriend. We’ve been dating for 3 days; she should know better!

Essentially, all the dumb things we did at that age, they’re carrying the torch, only technologically driven. That note that you dropped in 6th grade that let the entire school know that you farted out of nervousness during your choir performance, and that you’re kissing Bobby  at 3:15 after school is now a text message on an IPad. You’re thinking, great! I sure wish I could’ve emailed Bobby from my iPad. WRONG! I see more students because of cyber bullying than anything else. I have girls come in my office in tears because their chest is flat and their hair is nappy. I even had 6 students of whom I visit with DAILY intentionally start a fight so that they could upload it to IG in the hopes to get famous. Every day I catch a student in a random hallway laboriously texting, checking IG, Snapchat (by the way what the HELL does a 9 year old need with Snapchat. Hey guys, look at the homework I’m about to do. Totally turning up this weekend at Urban Air. Ho, sit down!)

Okay this is a rant. 

So listen, my colloquium presentation is going to center around the negative impact the internet, as well as technology has on the human psyche. Y’all, we are BOMBARDED with images daily. I know for me, I check Facebook and people are married, getting married, dating, having children, going to PA school, juggling basketballs while singing Bad and Boujee synonymously, and I’m just over here tryna get both socks to match. That’s a hit at my self esteem. I log onto IG and there’s eyebrows on fleek, cheekbones on contour, bundles, boobs, abs, relationship goals! That’s another hit at my self-esteem. Side note, I quit Snapchat. I don’t wanna see your makeup from 12 different angles for 30 minutes and I don’t wanna watch you record a party that you’re obviously not participating in because YOU’RE RECORDING IT! I actually like twitter cause Issa joke er’day and I feel connected. But my point is this, as a society, we are being bombarded every minute of the day with information we don’t need! Why you think ole dude won’t main you? Prolly cause he got 7 other females in his dms and he simply can’t choose who will be the most idealistic. The internet gives us this false sense of reality. We think “oh if the internet says it, it must be true”. If bae likes her picture then they’re prolly together. Let me set a PR for this jump to this raggedy conclusion I’m about to make. I posted this bomb picture. Fade on fleek, lashes on, tummy sucked in, Jays’s pristine. Now I’m sweating like a stripper doing taxes waiting for the results (likes) to come back validating and affirming I’m a dope human being.

I could go much further in discussion, but I’ll save that for colloquium. Moral of the story is, put ya phone down, get from behind your laptop, in front of the tv screen and go see life. Stop tweet watching, it will lead to your demise. Admire ole girl for dropping 30 pounds on IG, but don’t become envious and idolize her. Adopt a workout program and hit the gym. Eat a fruit, and a cookie (I like cookies). Deactivate your FB if you need too. You know you want a relationship and a baby, don’t trigger yourself by logging on to something that may potentially remind you of everything you don’t have, but want. 

In bible study last week, we talked about Guarding our hearts. Well I’m hear to say, guard them eyes. Just like we eat and defecate, the things you feed your mind manifest in your actions. And I’m not here to bash the internet. I am literally using it as we speak. But too much cargo overloads the plane. Control what you see, and put out some positive things into cyber world. I want you to try this. Get yourself slayed for the Gods, go somewhere nice and have fun. Now you ready? Okay. DONT TAKE ANY PICTURES. None. Zilch. Nada. Not of your feet, not of the restaurant, not of Bae’s elbow. NOTHING. Let life happen and revel in the beauty of the moment. That’s why the internet is crashing life, because we’re so busy recording and pushing pause, we’re forgetting to live.

Kids are so dope because they are so pure. They have their entire life to figure how to lie, compromise who they are, compare themselves and more. Take your iPad from your child and play with them sometimes. There is something so beautiful and irreplaceable about human touch. We wonder why in a society so rich, mental health is at an all time decline. As Erykah badu once said “I can make you put your phone down”. Read this post, then go put your phone down and live. 

Peace and Blessings! 


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